Go Go Go Go! Go Hammer!
So the Crashing Dread (Formerly known as Nydarlethotep) was playing with a toy digger...You know, those large peices of earthmoving equipment with a scoopshovel for moving...earth? Anyway, the Dread was playing with one and here's what I heard...
Crashing Dread: "Trundle trundle trundle trundle. Stop, hammer time."
... ... ...
I'm not sure which is scarier...that my son uses "trundle" for the sound effect of a large "tractor" as he calls it...or that he's quoting MC Hammer. Ok, yeah...I know which is scarier...and you know, as well.
Also, today, the Dread was flipping through a catalogue which came in today's mail and pointed at something within it and asked, "What's that?"
Elder Dad: "What?"
Crashing Dread: "That."
Elder Dad: "Oh, that's silverware."
Crashing Dread: "No, it's spoons and forks."
Elder Dad: "..."
Momma-thulu: "It's flatware, dahling."
Elder Dad: "..."
These people are crazy...forget about me, it's too late for me...Stay away...SAVE YOURSELF!
School's Out for Summer
So school's out for summer for some students in my fair district as of yesterday...July 14. This brings to a close the most farcical part of public education...which means a lot when you consider the abundence of farcical parts of public education, and which means even more when compared to the farcical parts of private education. Private education's motto? "There's nothing better than indoctrination!"
What closed as of today that I am speaking of is Summer School. The "I-Demand-A-Recount" portion of every years school year. It's a complete and utter mockery of the public education system.
Consider that in a school year, students are graded on performance within 4 nine-week periods, which means that students on average receive 180 days worth of education a year. Cutting the numbers short, the average student receives 1260 hours of education in your regular school year.
So a student fails to perform to standards. The public education facilities say that you can pass on to your next grade despite a failure to perform the required tasks assigned to you during the standard school year if you attend the prescribed summer school. Let me tell you, as an insider, that this summer school requires 4 hours a day for 4 days a week for 4 weeks.
64 hours versus 1260 hours...You'd almost think that students choosing summer school over actually trying during the regular school year would be primary candidates for political office.
Here are the facts. your child failed to meet the minimum criterium necessary for us to feel your child is ready for the next grade. Assuming your child did not fail more than 2 subjects, he can appeal for a reprieve via summer school to continure on. In summer school, if you are willing to let the teacher walk you through the material, in a greatly filtered form, than you get to pass.
Anyone feel comfortable saying that the guy who passed Medical School by taking summer classes is about to operate on your heart?
Summer School is teachers (including myself) looking for extra money by teaching students who couldn't pass where the majority of students could for the sake of the school district's endeavor to make a bit more money. We have students spending 1/100th of the time spent passing material that everyone else took the entire school year to pass so that they could remain with their fellow students who did pass what they failed...anyone else notice an inherant flaw?
What Do the London Bombings Mean?
Bombs went off in London killing around 50 people and injuring 700. We all know it...and until we find proof of who did it, there's not much else to say about it. Except...
Except, of course, we have to debate what it means. And the American politicians are running around trying to get their interpretation out to the American populace...because apparently we can't figure it out on our own. And who do we hear the most? Liberal Chicken Littles. "Look, the sky is falling, the sky is falling! Run! Hide! Al Quaida's bringing the sky down!"
Like this guy...
http://www.sobran.com/columns/2005/050707.shtmlHe criticizes Bush and Blair for their "we will bring them to justice" statements.
Your walking home with your loved one and a mugger runs out, grabs your belongings, and shoots your loved one dead. Do you want to hear, "Well, that's a tragedy, but you shouldn't have been in this neighborhood" or "Don't worry, we'll catch these cowardly, low-down, dirty bastards and make them pay"?
And don't give me any of that, "It won't bring them back" rhetorical bullshit. No fuck it won't bring them back. Whether you call it justice or reveange, it has nothing to do with reversing the damage...it's about preventing others from doing this type of shit. And no, that doesn't mean that I think that, if it was al Quaida, going after them and killing Bin Laden, or at least bringing him to trial, will end terrorist attacks. There's always some psycho who says, "I know what's going to happen, and I'm going to do it anyways." There are millions of smokers who smoke even though they know the risks...well, I guess we should just stop putting the Surgeons General Warnings on the packs, you think? No, of course not, because there's always the chance that some kid will see all the horrible stuff that cigarettes can do and say, "Well, you know...maybe I won't try smoking." In the Middle East, some kid's going to say, "You know...maybe I won't go kill people just because I don't agree with them."
And there are probably people out there criticizing Blair for refusing to talk about the bombings at the G8 conference. I say, "Good on ya', mate. The topic is Africa, not the bombings. We've all got jobs to do, let's do them."
Here's another gem from this guy and repeated over and over by Liberals: "Be that as it may, four years of tough talk, two unfinished wars against ill-defined enemies, and the toppling and capture of Saddam Hussein seem to have left us about where we started."
Well, no Joe, your own list shows that we are not where we started. The toppling and capture of Saddam Hussein is what is commonly referred to as...an achievement. If we stopped right now, we wouldn't leave the world just as it was be Saddam Insane would be off the Dictators market. Now, if we did stop right now, it wouldn't be long before another schmoe would step up and begin oppressing, starving, and killing his own Iraqi people, and the Kurds, and Americans when they happened to be in the wrong American Embassy at the wrong time. But right now...we are not right where we started.
But before we go any further...let's make sure we take this opportunity, like every other discussion of our war with Iraq or the war on terrorism, and say that we were lied to. Well, ignoring the fact that lying to the American public in order to get the public approval to enter war has been going on since the turn of the 20th century, so we shouldn't be that shocked, how were we lied to? WMDs? You want undeniable proof he had them? Well, I want undeniable proof he didn't. That means proof that he didn't try and buy Uranium from Africa, that the guy who used chemical and biological weapons against the Kurds and his own people was not sneaking those WMDs out of the facilities in those three trucks just before the inspection team arrived, and that Saddam's communications with Osama were exchanges of cake recipes rather than terror recipes.
And for the record, Joe...the terrorists don't want to conquer Britain. As you said, "Its purpose, obviously, is to terrorize". They want us to leave them alone to kill whomever they feel like killing. General rule of discipline, if the kids get angry because of it, you're doing the right thing. And the kids are pissed. But then, not quite as argumentative either. 4 years ago they killed around 3000 people with a plan that took them, what...2 years to bring together? This time, somethring thrown haphazardly together and which killed 50 people. This isn't a pissing contest. I'm not trying to say ours and bigger than theirs...I'm saying the terrorists seem to be heading toward impotence. They're probably trying to make some terrorist viagra in those Iraqi chemical producing trucks.
We are making a difference. We are having a positive effect. If we pick up and quit now, it'll be another Somalia...where Clinton gave the terrorists what they wanted, the removal of US troops, and yet terrorists strikes against Americans still occurred, and escalated.
Al Quaida being an organized group vs. Bin Laden on the run and al Quaida being scattered.
Descalation of the scale of terrorist attacks (not number, scale) vs. escalation of the scale.
Hope of Democracy in Iraq vs. Iraq being run by mass-murdering Dictator.
Yep, we're just about where we started...
Discipline Personified
Old Post #2:
So...Are many fathers treated as Discipline Personified out there? Does the Elder Dads of the omniverse cause such fear in all children? See, it was bedtime...My wife said, "Oy, lazy bastard, I'm cooking your food. Help me by putting your children to sleep" or some such thing...So I got up and assisted...which meant I crossed the house and said, "Hey, kids...time for bed. Let's go." So I carry the Crawling Chaos with me as the Creeping Terror follows me...Nydar nowhere in site. As I change Crawling Chaos and Creeping Terror, I hear from the kitchen my wife say, "You need to go get your guys ready for bed."
Nydar: "No!"
Mama-thulu: "Go get your guys ready for bed. It's time for sleep sleep."
Nydar: "No!...It's not time for sleep sleep!"
Mama-thulu: "Go get your guys ready for bed or I'll lete Dada tuck you in."
Nydar: "NOOOOO!!!!"
Yep, the mere mention of my name involved in any sleep preparations bring cries and shrieks of terror. That's me...The indescribable, horrific personification of...fatherhood.
Addendum: Nydarlathotep continues to fear my tuckings in despite bravely facing them while Mama-Thulu was in the hospital with the Rampaging Bulk. Mama-Thulu tries to assure Nydar that I am capable of putting him to bed and tucking him in, and I need to do so sometimes because sometimes Mama-Thulu can't, but that's like telling a liberal that we can bring a relative peace and Democracy in Iraq if they would just be patient. Worse, the fear of the Elder-Dad has spread to the Creeping Terror. I've still got it.
Excerpts From the Dad-Cronomicon
Old Post #1:
And Yea, did 3 year-old Nydarlathotep appear in the Bowels of the Miskatonic Kitchen. Primordial tentacles of hair stood in defiance of the Old Dads! Spying the Old Dad of ancient, forgotten mythologies, Nydar schlurped past the elder demon. With an evil glint in his mischeivously limpid blue eyes, Nydar spoke: "I have Mama in my shoulder, and she has baby brother is her tummy." And the Elder Dad did scream in horror!
Welcome to MY morning...
Ok...Let's Try This Again...
Hello, I am...PTA...Parent...Teacher...Asshole. I had another blog called The Misadventures of Super-Dad where, in several months I put up...3 posts. I decided part of the problem is that, focusing on my fatherly adventures limited me too much, and even though I could technically talk about anything...it's my own blog so screw you, I can talk about anything...but my mind had an issue with the title focusing on the parental life. So, since I had a weird OCD problem with the title, I decided that the best way to get myself over that hump is to start a new blog whose title does not limit my output...Thus, I named the new blog after myself...PTA: Parent, Teacher, Asshole.
Qualifications:
Parent: Father of 4 children under 3 years old. The 3 year old son, Nydarlathhotep...or Nydar, for short. My 2 year old daughter, the Creeping Terror, and my 1 year old daughter, the Crawling Chaos. Plus, the new-born son (as of June 6), the Rampaging Bulk.
Teacher: I teach middle school language arts at an alternative academy for students who get expelled from the other district schools.
Asshole: Just my natural state.
So, now that that ugliness is out of the way...The first two posts are going to be my two posts from the MOSD blog because I like them. Then we'll get on with new stuff.
Have fun.
