Curriculum Development: Day 1
So, today was my first day working on developing a curriculum for the district. Our focus is on determining what "experiences" every student should have before they finish whatever grade they are in. I chose the 8th grade. Because I am the sole middle school teacher at Alty School, I teach grades 6-8. Apparently sixth grade wasn't present, so I had to pick 7th or 8th. &th grade already had two representatives, while 8th only had one, so I chose to even up the sides. By the time the last teacher straggled in, there were four 7th grade teachers and three 8th grade teachers, counting me. Then, the trouble...
"Mr. Asshole, did you bring your textbook."
"Uh, no. I was called just a couple of days ago and wasn't told to bring anything, but I can have it tomorrow."
This continued throughout the day...
"Mr. Asshole, did you get this book?"
"What book?"
"This very important book?"
"Uh, no, never heard of it."
Luckily, three of the seven of us had never received the book.
"Mr. Asshole, do you have those?"
"Have what?"
"The student workbooks that go with the texts?"
"Uh, no, but I do have the text books."
"The 8th grade wants to do
The Outsiders, is that ok, Mrs. Coordinator? And we'll let the 7th grade keep
Watsons Go to Birmingham"
"Yes, McSnot, that's fine. Mr. Asshole, you have those don't you?"
"Well, I did when I first got the job six years ago, but I think they were left in what passed for a bookroom when I moved to my portable, and I don't know if I have any copies."
"Well, we have plenty of used copies that are going to just be thrown away that we could send your way if you don't mind hand-me-downs."
"No, Mrs. McSnot, he doesn't need hand-me-downs..."
"No, Mrs. Coordinator, I'll happily take hand-me-downs as long as they are readable."
"Hey, the old textbook had this great bit about this! Mrs. Coordinator, can we use something from an old text?"
"Sure. Mrs. Snot. Mr. Asshole, do you have a copy of the old text?"
"No. I was overwhelmed when I got the new textbooks, because I never had textbooks before."
"We'll run copies for you."
Sigh...Thanks for noticing me...
Mr. Asshole: Freelance Teacher
Well, I wasn't teaching summer school do to No Child Left Behind and the possibly warped up hiring decision of this year's director. Basically, teachers at the school where I wanted to do summer school got first priority, including teachers newly signed for the next school year. Then teachers who have taught summer school there in the past.
Well, my alternative school, naturally, doesn't have its own summer school program. Any of our guys need to go to summer school; they end up back at their home school. I've been teaching summer school since I started in the school district 7 years ago. I always taught social studies. That came about because I graduated college with a degree in Secondary Education: History and English. So my former principal jumped at the chance to hire me because I would be teaching...history and English. This was back when there were only two teachers in the middle school program.
But Principal Walks-on-Water said that I really only needed to take the Praxis for the English certification, because that would be my primary focus. I just never chose to spend the money to get the history certification. Well, that decision burned me. I had requested an English summer school class...I always requested an English class, but I always got assigned a history class. Fine. But this year, the director asked if I had certification to teach social studies because he already had all the English teachers he needed. When I told him my situation, college degree but no certification, he responded that the previous director must have flown me in under the radar.
Great! I've been a Language Arts refugee in a strange Social Studies land all of these years!
So I found myself with my first summer off since I became a teacher. What's a guy to do...
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
Well, honestly, between naps I did eat some, and read some, and whatnot.
Then, came the call, "Mr. Asshole, Mr. Dewey from Local Middle School called."
So I rang the man up.
"So, Mr. Asshole, did you find a summer school position at one of the other schools?"
"No, sir. To be honest, I didn't really try."
"Well, here's the thing. I have a teacher who's going to be out next week and we need a sub. When I found out I thought I'd call you first."
"Well, sign me up."
"And I think we'll need you the next week for someone else."
"Sure, just let me know."
But apparently word had gotten out that I would be sitting on my duff all summer, so I got another call.
"Mr. Asshole, this is Principal Powwow, did you get my message about English?"
"No, ma'am, I was just told to give you a call."
"Well, I was at a thing and ran into Mrs. Grim, the English Curriculum Coordinator. She was saying how she was meeting with other middle school English teachers next week to create some common experiences for the students to have no matter what school they are at. She wanted to make sure you were aware of it because she said you always participate, you are creative, and open to new ideas."
"Ah, she's just buttering me up. But I'll be subbing at summer school next week."
"Yeah, well, they will be meeting after summer school lets out, and it's always good for someone from our school to make an appearance. Oh, and they are paying."
"Ok, well let me check with Mrs. Asshole."
So, now a summer of nothing has turned quite busy for at least the next week and a half. Three days of subbing next week, and two days the following week. Five days of curriculum development. Plus my nearly every Thursday optional gathering with my coworkers for a discussion led by Mrs. Powwow about how things will run next year.
That's me...Mr. Asshole: Freelance Teacher
Teaching Tirade
On Tuesday this week, I went to retake a portion of the National Boards test. This year was my second attempt. I feel pretty good about it, but the problem with the National Boards is that as much as they tell you, they don't really tell you much. I mean, yeah, they tell you how things are scored and what the scores mean, but it's not very pertinent information. It's like, "If you scored a 1, did you do X? Y? Z?" Well, I thought I did...how about you tell me what I screwed up?
I arrived at the testing center with all materials in hand including some reading material, because I was early. The lady signing people in and whatnot asked if she could help me and I told her I was early and what I was there to take. She asked, "
Would you like to study some, or are you ready?"
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Study! That's funny. Now, I can't comment on other subjects, but the Middle School English stuff, what am I going to study? It's not about learning something, it's about convincing someone else that you know what the hell you are doing, which is going to be a whole other tirade in a moment. I can't say anything about the question at all lest National Board Secret Police come storming into my house and carry me away to conveniently disappear. I will say that it's stuff any English should know. It's not about knowing, it's about expression, expressing that you know in a clear, concise, and convincing manner. Blah fucking blah. I will say that I am not convinced that personal teaching preference doesn't affect how I'm going to get scored, and if someone scores my test response and they just disagree with my style, then that could affect my score.
I had about 30 minutes to compose my response and I had to rush the second portions response to be able to finish with about 10 seconds to spare. I felt good about it, but it depends on for what they are looking.
Now begins my tirade that I mentioned above. I find it amazing how teachers are told and taught about effective teaching and assessing strategies, but those strategies are used on the teachers themselves. I noticed this first in my secondary education classes in college. They'll teach you how to teach to multiple intelligences, and making fair tests, and such...but they do so teaching to one intelligence and giving tests with trick questions. I know it's not all education professors, but it seemed there were a lot of them in the classes I took. The same goes for National Boards. Teachers, how many complaints would you receive if you gave a project or test to your students, gave the students a grade, but never gave any feedback about what was missed or done wrong? That's the National Boards. A score with no feedback.
But I know what it is. They make their money off of people going through the process, and the more times you have to go again, the more money they make.
But then we teachers put up with a lot in the name of our chosen profession. Think about...I went to college for four years (I'm not counting the years a floundered from major to major) at Auburn University (WAR EAGLE!), then moved back to my home state where, in order to get a teaching certificate, I had to pay money to take a test...So, a four year degree isn't enough? Well, fuck me...Then, to keep my teaching certificate, I have to take classes and give presentations and such to earn
recertification points in a period of time...So the test wasn't enough either, fuck me sideways...And some say it's to make sure that teachers are well trained, No Child Left Behind and shit, but that doesn't make much sense. I mean, a good teacher doesn't get to work at 8:00 and leave at 4:00, leave school
behind on the weekend and holidays and summers...Most teachers take papers and tests home at night and on weekends and holidays. Most teachers work on, revamp, tweak lesson plans at night and on weekends and holidays. But that's not enough, we also have to require teachers to take classes, make presentations, etc. etc. With little pay. Don't give me that, "Well, you have the summer off" junk...No, I don't. I'm planning for next year. I would be taking a class if it hadn't been cancelled. We teachers spend so much time grading, planning, calling, reading, learning for our classrooms, that the actual teaching part seems like just a small responsibility, not the primary concern that it should be. We make it harder for someone to become a teacher, slimming down the teachers available, ask more of the teachers we do have, increasing the chance of burnout, which will lead again to fewer teachers.
I love being a teacher, I do...I just hate how everyone views the teaching profession: either that we should do everything without complaint, or that we don't do anything and don't deserve more.
