PTA: Parent, Teacher, Asshole

Mr. Asshole: Freelance Teacher

Well, I wasn't teaching summer school do to No Child Left Behind and the possibly warped up hiring decision of this year's director. Basically, teachers at the school where I wanted to do summer school got first priority, including teachers newly signed for the next school year. Then teachers who have taught summer school there in the past.

Well, my alternative school, naturally, doesn't have its own summer school program. Any of our guys need to go to summer school; they end up back at their home school. I've been teaching summer school since I started in the school district 7 years ago. I always taught social studies. That came about because I graduated college with a degree in Secondary Education: History and English. So my former principal jumped at the chance to hire me because I would be teaching...history and English. This was back when there were only two teachers in the middle school program.

But Principal Walks-on-Water said that I really only needed to take the Praxis for the English certification, because that would be my primary focus. I just never chose to spend the money to get the history certification. Well, that decision burned me. I had requested an English summer school class...I always requested an English class, but I always got assigned a history class. Fine. But this year, the director asked if I had certification to teach social studies because he already had all the English teachers he needed. When I told him my situation, college degree but no certification, he responded that the previous director must have flown me in under the radar.

Great! I've been a Language Arts refugee in a strange Social Studies land all of these years!

So I found myself with my first summer off since I became a teacher. What's a guy to do...

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Well, honestly, between naps I did eat some, and read some, and whatnot.

Then, came the call, "Mr. Asshole, Mr. Dewey from Local Middle School called."

So I rang the man up.

"So, Mr. Asshole, did you find a summer school position at one of the other schools?"
"No, sir. To be honest, I didn't really try."
"Well, here's the thing. I have a teacher who's going to be out next week and we need a sub. When I found out I thought I'd call you first."
"Well, sign me up."
"And I think we'll need you the next week for someone else."
"Sure, just let me know."

But apparently word had gotten out that I would be sitting on my duff all summer, so I got another call.

"Mr. Asshole, this is Principal Powwow, did you get my message about English?"
"No, ma'am, I was just told to give you a call."
"Well, I was at a thing and ran into Mrs. Grim, the English Curriculum Coordinator. She was saying how she was meeting with other middle school English teachers next week to create some common experiences for the students to have no matter what school they are at. She wanted to make sure you were aware of it because she said you always participate, you are creative, and open to new ideas."
"Ah, she's just buttering me up. But I'll be subbing at summer school next week."
"Yeah, well, they will be meeting after summer school lets out, and it's always good for someone from our school to make an appearance. Oh, and they are paying."
"Ok, well let me check with Mrs. Asshole."

So, now a summer of nothing has turned quite busy for at least the next week and a half. Three days of subbing next week, and two days the following week. Five days of curriculum development. Plus my nearly every Thursday optional gathering with my coworkers for a discussion led by Mrs. Powwow about how things will run next year.

That's me...Mr. Asshole: Freelance Teacher

posted by Bodog @ 9:32 AM